I am in the process of changing habits, and one of them is morphing from a night owl into a morning person.
There were years where I got up early and had a mind/soul strengthening morning routine. I would teach or take 6:30am fitness classes. I would journal. I would meditate. I grew to love the pre-dawn hours when everything was so quiet and calm, it felt like I had the necessary space to untangle whatever emotions came up in my sleep. I could focus my intentions and objectives for the day.
I left that behind when I was no longer working a traditional 9 to 6pm, and chose a different life -- that of a freelancer, auditioning and working actor, and more frequent fitness instructor. Classes for me were mainly afternoon and evening except for weekends, which were on the early side. I had to roll with auditions popping up and prepping for them into the late night hours, or meeting a writing deadline that may be taking longer than I planned. I lost some of the routine but appreciated how no day ever looked the same.
Now I am marrying the two. I’ve been in LA for a month and am bringing back a very solid morning routine. It is enormously grounding for me and since I do find the nights the hardest, I don’t really need to stay up too late.
The change is so far having such a positive effect. I’m teaching earlier. I am getting work done before 2pm. The energy I vibe on at 6am fills my space -- one of my friends who knew me in New York came over yesterday and observed it has the same energy as my Chelsea apartment, which almost made me cry.
So many things are almost making me cry these days. The tears are stuck, though.
I am spending a lot of time alone. I don’t mind, exactly, it is very refreshing in a way to have this solitude and abundance of space. I have so much on my plate that requires solo time to accomplish, and it feels like a gift.
The time spent teaching or with friends feels even richer.
My job search is the primary focus of each day. Teaching is a very part time thing at the moment, freelance writing is all about building up my base, and I am seeking new legit and commercial representation for LA.
I am in a growth phase and yes, of course I could get into the “I should be …” in a certain place by now, but I refuse to think that way for any sustained period of time. I am doing the best I can and that will always be enough.